brainwork on a Saturday! *sob.

I'm stuck in a rut.

The bond is really really not something I want to be bound to, but I feel the place would be good for me. 2 years is an awfully long period of time and the penalty is huge. @_@ But as crazy as it sounds, I like the place - more importantly, I like the people I could potentially be working with. Earlier this morning I got a call from my potential supevisor, asking me the reasons, and explaining on his end bout the reasons of the bond, and all that stuff. I've never gotten anyone telling me that they really want me to be a part of their team.. I mean this is given the fact that they've only met me thrice.

And then there's the next contender around the corner, which is a well-known IT consultancy company.. (If I ace the interview, that is.) The perks, growth, opportunity, name, all that jizz.. is very obvious. And from what little I've met of them (previously for a one-day event), the people look like fun.. Also, the opportunities for international exposure and experience is definitely there.

Is it always about going for the bigger, better-known company? How do you consider what's a good place to work in - apart from pay and employee benefits? Numbers to me are 'not' as important as the people I'll be working with. I want to enjoy what I do, where I'm at and who I'm with. I say this cause right now, right here, I'm not enjoying what I do *nor* the people I'm working with (specifically one person but let's not go there, not on a weekend).

On one end, he said that 2 years really isn't a long period of time - you'll learn heaps within then. Not just on-the-job training, but proper training and official certification of software and stuff I'll be required to use on the job. It's about building us freshies from ground up and the reason they have that bond is so that their investment doesn't bail out on them. It ain't easy to train one, and once trained we need the skills & expertise we've trained up to contribute to the company in return. Also, they see me being part of them - I find this impressive somehow.. it's got a lot of depth in that statement - it means that they can see me not just as another worker bee but one that can contribute positively in more ways than one. The word 'appreciative' might be useful here but I'm not sure how to tie it in this context..

Also, if I asked one of my 2 pillars of advice (specifically the one who's a veteran in the industry) -again- and revealing this new input (my input la), I know what she would say - she would probably think I'm cutting off my nose to spite my face just to serve a selfish 'want' without considering my own future. Why give up the opportunity with a big company when it comes knocking on your door? Everyone will be dying to grab it! Besides, being tied down for 2 years is a big thing. Even if you don't get this one, what if something better comes along the way? Then you won't be able to pursue it because of this. It's not a smart idea, and it's not even common practice in the industry. Not for so long, and not with such a big penalty. If they'll waive/remove it, then you take it. Otherwise, drop it.

sigh. Both sides have their point, and both cannot back down. And I cannot please both. And I cannot please myself cause either way, I'll get flak from one of them. sigh!

Also.. it raises a good question. What kind of career path do I see myself going upon? Like really, what do I want to be doing few years down the road? The truth is, I don't know! I don't know what it is I'm really good at, nor what it is I truly am passionate at. I just know that I'm the type that can figure out any puzzle you throw at me. Which type of puzzle I love best, I don't know - I don't think I've seen enough to know what I like more.

I'll wait till Wednesday.. and see how it goes.
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Had a weird dream of being posessed by a... I dunno, like those keong-si things from Mario. Not that I was jumping around like one, just that because I had to repress my posessed self from doing so, it was.. really difficult. Like having repeatedly hit your head against a wall but you can't exactly help it. But you're trying.
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Was superly sleepy today.. Woke up at 8:15AM and went omfg work in 15! Reached the door at 5 minutes past.. and conveniently dropped my tag on the other side of the glass divider so I was stuck there for a good minute or so. Felt like an idiot. =P
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Last night we went to Tony Roma's. Which was tons and tons of awesome XD
Today we went to mizu.. which was pretty good, but not as awesome. For one good reason, and that I think I don't need to say =P

I'm definitely gonna miss Khalil & Fiza, they're pretty good fun to be with. Fiza's crazier, and Khalil is.. haha just who he is. I think we share a common point of suffering, but man they're lucky they're freed from this shackle that binds them.. and hopefully we'll keep in touch la! =)