loser

Went to Sungei Wang. I don't have much to say about it. Apart from it smelling of nicotine and the haven for jang-ness, I have no affections toward it whatsoever. Ai-chan won something for a gempak-sponsored event.

Saw a lot of CF forumers...like kiyaa, matsuru, lin-che', keiichi, kitsune(I knew I've seen this guy at bon odori or something...I just can't put my finger at it), alot of others which I didn't catch the name or forgot, and sizer. Sizer. @_@ She bites! That's something I never expected. She's.. I can't really classify her as anything. Just jumpy, and...um...bitey.

Felt guilty cause I had ai-chan's parents to ferry me there and back. I really hate that, cause I seem so dependent, the thought of it makes me hate myself. I've got to learn how to drive. Definitely. I hate myself for my dependence.

And I got a telling-off from mom about how I had this 'loser' attitude. "You're a loser if you think you are. I'm so disappointed with you. If you've concluded that you've lost even before you've begun, then you've really lost." I think I chose the wrong words. I didn't join that competition cause I had not much interest in it. Instead I told her that I 'wasn't good enough'. That sorta set off the bomb.

She continued at dinner."So everyone's a loser in their own way." I get the point. I do. I don't plan to repeat it in your face to show you that I understand.